On married life so far…

It is less than a year since our wedding and I must admit that every day is a great learning experience. H and I were friends for over ten years before and thought we knew each other pretty well but marriage has thrown that assumption out the window. We have had to get used to each other on a really personal level, which is not easy for people who had lived solo prior toย living together. What has been a great lesson for me is not to make any assumptions about anything. Especially who is to do what.ย We are two people who share similar values and background but have been brought up differently. I do not have any brothers neither does he. I am from a small family of three girls, he is the only brother to four sisters. But we are moving along well and I love it. And I know the results of our different reactions in various situations are what will create our own traditions in our young family.

When I read thisย earlier today some of the points really stuck home especially 2, 6 and 10.

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We went visiting some good friends a couple who have been together for about seventeen years when this played out…ย 

Him: P. please lock the door so the dog does not get into the house.

Her: OKย 

About ten minutes later…ย 

Him: Honey, did you lock the door?

Her: Yes I didย 

A few minutes later there is a cold draft coming inย 

Him: Did you lock the door when I asked you too?

Her : I think so, I am not sure did you ask me to?

Him: I did a while ago and I am sure these guys heard me too

Her: Oh, ok

Him: Can you lock the door now?

Her: Ok, I will, let me just finish what I am doing

Him: Just do it now, you will forget and who knows who or what can come in the house when you are all alone with the door unlocked.

Her: Ok fine I’ll close it but you do not have to get too dramatic about it.ย 

There was a pause then the guy got up to lock the door himself.ย 

I was trying so hard not to laugh because good people, H and I do have the same conversation just that the roles are reversed and for me it is the windows and doors and because of security and the neighbours’ cats, no dogs.

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William Shakespeare on Love….

Let me not to the marriage of true minds
Admit impediments. Love is not love
Which alters when it alteration finds.
Or bends with the remover to remove:
O, no! it is an ever-fixed mark,
That looks on tempests and is not shaken:
It is the star to every wandering bark,
Whose worth’s unknown, although his height be taken.
Loves’s not time’s fool, though rosy lips and cheeks
Within his bending sickle’s compass come;
Love alters not with his brief hours and weeks,
But bears it out even to the edge of doom,
If this be error, and upon me proved,
I never writ, nor no man ever loved.

William Shakespeare (1564-1616)

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A Good Wedding Cake

Just came across this “recipe”. I like ๐Ÿ™‚

4 lb. of love.
1 lb. butter of youth.
1/2 lb. of good looks.
l lb. sweet temper.
1 lb. of blindness for faults.
1 lb. of self forgetfulness.
l lb. of pounded wit.
l lb. of good humour.
2 tablespoons of sweet argument.
1 pint of rippling laughter.
1 wine glass of common sense.
1 oz. modesty.

Put the love, good looks and sweet temper into a well furnished house. Beat the butter of youth to a cream, and mix well together with the blindness of faults. Stir the pounded wit and good humour into the sweet argument, then add the rippling laughter and common sense. Work the whole together until everything is well mixed, and bake gently for ever.

Author: Unknown

Faithfulness

Faithfulness is defined as adhering firmly and devotedly, as to a person, cause or idea; loyal.

Worthy of trust or belief; reliable. Undeviating attachment. (Source: www.freedictionary.com)

It is also one of the fruits of the Holy Spirit.

When two people get married, they vow to be loyal/faithful to each other in all entirety; body, mind and soul. However, being the fickle beings we are, we love shifting goalposts to justify our shortcomings.ย 

I recently finished reading Marla Taviano’s โ€œFrom Blushing Bride to Wedded Wifeโ€.

Nice read

It is a good and easy book to read full of practical advice for a new bride written in a humorous style that does not come across as self-righteous. In one of the chapters entitled ‘Faithfulness In Action’, she tackles the above topic in its entirety, From lust, guarding one’s eyes and heart, tempting thoughts and even dressing.

She talks about dangers of comparing your husband to other men, thoughts such as โ€œI wish my husband was more patient, considerate, spiritual, poetic, loving … like so and soโ€. It is dangerous to fantasize about desirable qualities in other men that your husband lacks as it can lead to an emotional affair very fast e.g. if your man in not easy to talk to, you find yourself opening up to another man maybe a friend, a colleague, and as it gets more intense, you justify your feelings by arguing that your man is too busy, so its alright as long as it does not go too far…well, how far is too far? I think it is better to play it safe and not even consider such.

Read Proverbs 5:15-17

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways

1. Your strength, you are a strong man and I love how you take charge and the head of the home that you are.

2. You are God fearing. I love that you believe in God and you are taking theย lead in prayer in our marriage.

3. You are a great provider, generous and there is nothing I lacked and have felt the need to ask you for.

4. You know me so well, inside and out, you understand what makes me tick.

5. You are intuitive.

6. You are great at your job.

7. You are a man ofย  vision and action.

8. You are humble.

9. You haveย  a great sense of humor and so funny ๐Ÿ™‚

10.You are a go getter and work hard to achieve your dreams.

11. You are a man of integrity.

12.You are a great leader.

13. You are faithful and dependable.

14. You are flexible but also firm when situations demand it.

15. You have fabulous negotiating skills.

16. You are protective and sincere.

17. You are soย good at keeping time.

18. You are tolerant ( of me especially).

19. You are trustworthy.

20. You are a sportsman. I came to know what a triathlon is through you. he he

Toย  be continued……